Thursday, June 17, 2010

June

I've been dealing with some depression the last couple months. All of my life I have gone through a cycle of ups and downs. Bipolar maybe? I have long thought that the women in my family suffer from bipolar disorder, but none of us have had the courage to seek a diagnosis. I am prone to major episodes of depression and it is the darndest to try and recover from those. However, I think I have found a godsend.

As you've read, I have had some minor pain episodes. When those happen I just pop an Oxcarb (aka Trileptal) and a Gabapentin (aka Neurontin). Sometimes I have to do this a couple times a day for a few days, just to keep the pain in line. I started noticing, whenever I take my doses, I feel better emotionally. The depression symptoms subside and I no longer feel a big gaping hole in my heart. I decided to test this out. The last two months I have been battling the depression and the manic episodes. (I am pretty sure they're manic but god forbid, I am not an expert, lest someone call me out on it). Anyway, when I feel a mood coming on, I pop a pair of pills. Within an hour or two I feel much better. I feel normal and I feel like I can enjoy life.

I was baffled by this and started researching the medications side effects. I came across some very interesting information.

"Anticonvulsants are used in the treatment of bipolar disorder as mood stabilizers. Although they were originally developed for the treatment of epilepsy, they have been shown to relieve the symptoms of mania and reduce mood swings."  - http://helpguide.org


There are alot more sites out there touting the same info. I am wondering if this mood stabilizing is further proof of bipolar disorder. I did take one of those screenings during a depressive episode and ended up with the result of "moderate to severe signs of bipolar disorder." It seems that all my life I have had these cycles and they just seem to be getting closer together and harder to deal. 


I am still thankful everyday that I do not have constant pain like I did last year. I can't believe it's already been 9 months (to the day!) since I've had my MVD surgery. I recovered well and I am handling the smaller attacks okay too. 


Will keep the blog updated as much as possible, at least once a month. 

If anyone has any questions, please feel free to email me at misobrien at yahoo dot com and I would be happy to offer any advice or support.